Welcome, Dear Reader

Well, it’s Wednesday night 11:49 on September 2, 2009. This is the eve of the commencement of Project Soulmate. I, Blanche, and my friends Sophia and Dorothy, (not our real names -- yes, we've chosen the Golden Girls as our inspiration) for our past few months of singledom, and in my case years, have traded the books on rules, dating advice, dating guides etc. for books that eschew all of that and emphasize dating to find your soulmate - books that reject the notion that there are key things one must do in order to make men want you. We are the girls who believe that we will find our soulmates, our one and onlies, the ones who want us just the way we are, the ones with whom we’re meant to be with as ordained by the universe, god, and the publishing companies who sold us these books. Yes, we’ve bought that whole notion and we’re not giving up on it. It’s all about magnetizing so that we can attract our heavenly mates - but this does not happen, apparently, without a lot of personal reflection, accessing of our higher selves, and investment in some art supplies.


And although we’ve spent a lot of time discussing the ideas in these books with each other, we realized that we never quite followed through with all of the exercises, never wholeheartedly embraced the principals of the books and realized that our avoidance stems from the fact that it often feels like homework and jeez, who the hell likes homework? Well, in fact, I actually don’t mind it when I’m forced to do it. But that’s just the thing. No one was forcing us to do it, so while completing week one, two, and sometimes three of the exercises in these books was often inspired and characterized by enthusiasm and excitement, the ensuing weeks were usually marked by weariness and eventually even a resentfulness that finding a soulmate should be so much work. No one else we knew in relationships did this much work to achieve their successful relationship. (But wait, everyone we knew in a relationship did not seem to be in a successful relationship, at least not by our standards, they certainly didn’t seem like soulmate relationships – isn’t that why we’ve held out til this point and become these unmarried 35 and 40 year olds?)  


So is there value to this work, we wondered, enough to spend all of this time doing these exercises? We didn’t know. But we wanted to be sure that we’d tried. And so that we’d have a good reason to be the pissed off old spinsters that failure would mean we’d become. So discipline, back to discipline. We wondered about how we might be more disciplined so we could finally fucking complete a book. Discipline, accountability. That’s what we lacked. How, how, how to do work when no one is making us we wondered?
 
And that’s when the brilliant Sophia stumbled upon the idea of a blog, a blog to recount our efforts in each chapter of a different soulmate seeking guide. Yes, yes, yes.We discussed this and concluded that this is the only way to stay accountable. We will blog - and then you dear sympathetic public will hold us accountable. You will give us the discipline we need to find our soulmates. It is you dear public sympathizers that we will toast at our weddings for bringing us together with our beloveds. We will take turns covering a chapter or section and discuss our experiences with you about doing these exercises. We will tell you about the ups and downs, the past relationships that must be dealt with, and the baggage in every other form that comes up as we take on the personal challenges that the exercises present. Yes, this is the idea and this is the night it all begins.
 
-- Blanche